"Gobble, gobble, gobble! It's just words darling!" Have you ever noticed that people use too many words? They take forever to get to the point and say what they mean. It's maddening. Really. I've been grumpy this week and my tolerance for people who are stuck on stupid has plummeted to next to nil.
I'm coming to the realization that I may not have a choice, I may not get to put off surgery until the first of next year. Time will tell but all the early signs are pointing to a developing tolerance to the higher dosage of pain medication. This realization is behind my grumpiness. Okay, that and some serious sex and SM cravings. We've had a bit of a drought due to Master working all month long and my higher pain levels. These things just don't contribute to an amorous environment.
I'm frustrated and stressed. Master says focus on the positive so I try. I try to not let the pain and exhaustion get me down and that isn't always easy. I get so worn down that my emotions get frayed and my control over them is less than optimal. I'd get more rest if I could but if I go to bed any earlier I may as well give up life all together. I barely spend any time with Master and HRS as it is. I'm already going to bed at 9:00, sometimes as early as 8 or 8:30 if I've fallen asleep watching TV. Sometimes I feel like a little kid. I don't want to go to bed early, I want to stay up because I don't want to miss the fun, whatever that might be.
So that's where I am today. I'm still working on getting pictures of Master's collar so I can share here. It's been a blessing. Master has incorporated it into helping me not binge on junk foods. Whenever I have the urge I'm to touch his collar and remember who owns me and who makes the rules. So far so good.
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