Nervous, excited, and scared

Today we travel to see our girlfriend and meet her husband for the weekend. I am so excited and nervous. I'm also feeling insecure and maybe a little jealous.

 It seems like they talk on the phone and text more often than she and I do. sometimes it feels like she's more interested in,attached to, and attracted to him than she is to me.  It's irrational and illogical. Our relationships with each other are going to be different right?

 Then I catch little snippets of their texts or conversations and he's saying silly lovey dovey things to her that I wish he'd say to me. Like ending a conversation with "hugs kisses and bites" I know it's NRE, I'm saying the same things. We're all twitterpated. But I feel a little jealous of her receiving that kind of attention from him and vice versa. I wonder, where's mine?

 I think he fits in with more of her fantasies and fetishes than I do. What role do I play in her life? What needs does she have that I can meet? How do I share my position as his submissive with her? Will she replace me? Will he replace me?

 I am afraid of being left out. I'm afraid of being replaced in both of their lives by each of them. I really care about her and I love him I don't want to lose any of that. I want to be important to both of them. I want to be valued by them. I want to be loved by them.

 I don't know if I could just be friends with her if they decided that they wanted to be a twosome instead of our threesome.

 I know I need to focus on the things I can control (myself), the things I have, and the good stuff I'm feeling.

That's where I'm at today. Nervous, excited, and scared.