Saturday, June 17, 2006

It's The Simple Things


I feel at peace this morning, calm, happy, and relaxed. I know I have homework to do yet today but it feels as if there is plenty of time for it. I don't feel rushed, harried, or frenzied. I'm alone in the house and it feels good. I took time to do the sinks full of dishes, I feel accomplished. One less task for Master to do.

Master and the offspring are off to his company picnic, I could have gone, he wished me to, but he also knew I'd be uncomfortable (physically) and out of place. Hard benches and lots of standing do not make for a fun-to-play-with-later-slave. I have nothing in common with the people he works with and he's assured me that if ever the women at the gathering saw me they'd glom onto me wanting all the juicy little details I could give them about him. Not a fun position for me, who abhors the usual male-bashing gossip-swapping that a lot of women participate in. This is why I don't socialize with many women. I tried in the past to socialize with the wives of Master's co-workers and it was horrible and was definitely enough to put me off of their type forever. Maybe I'm just socially inept because if I have nothing to contribute to a certain discussion I don't say anything at all. I'm not good at making small talk so I don't try.

I'm not too proud to say that I'm uncomfortable with meeting strangers looking as I do. Yes, yes, still insecure. I'm working at changing things but not very hard just now. I don't want them to see me as his "fat wife" and yes, that's probably just something in my head, it still bothers me.

So now to school work and a presentation/report on carpal tunnel syndrome. I hope I can stay awake while writing it. *laughing*

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