Monday, April 30, 2007

No Question

Being the girly girl I am, there are certain things that I think are just gross and I'd really prefer to not have to do, or be exposed to, them. One of them is touching another person's feet. I'm getting better about touching Master's feet at least. I don't mind massaging lotion into them.

I was doing just that when I mentioned to him that he needed to clip his toenails. He got a wild hair and decided to have me do it. I had a few minutes of thinking that he had to be kidding or just yanking my chain but he was utterly serious. So, with a little bit of grousing about how gross it was, I proceeded to get the clippers and set to my task.

It doesn't seem like it was that long ago when I would have balked until he decided it was too much trouble to "dom" me into doing it. Once I realized he wasn't joking, I didn't question that I was going to do it. I took my time and made sure I didn't leave any jagged edges or pointy spots. By the time I'd finished I found myself feeling pleased that I'd done a good job and taken care of my Master.

He told me afterwards that if I hadn't let on how much it bothered me to do it, he wouldn't have pursued the subject. Basically the only reason he had me do it is because I objected, he enjoyed my struggle between revulsion and obedience. But, now what? In my mind it is now on the list of services I perform for him. He seemed to enjoy being cared for in that way. Maybe I misread him and what he was really enjoying was my discomfort. We really haven't talked about it since Friday night.

Nine years ago I would never have dreamed that clipping his toenails would make me feel so good about myself. I remember reading others' retellings of doing this sort of service and saying "No way am I doing that." You know what they say about never saying never right? *wry grins*

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