Well, I've learned a valuable lesson tonight. Sick Masters can still spank very, very hard.
I'm sitting here on one sore tushie. Well, half a sore tushie. I've been in a general foul mood today and Master made the observation that when I get into moods like this it's because I need some pain because my mood drastically improves afterwards.
Pain is often catharitc for me and is a release for the emotional build-up. And yes, as a masochist I need pain play to be a happy slave. I'm just too stubborn or something to ask for it when I need it. Part of that is due in large part to not wanting to be selfish. I know he can't read my mind and if I have needs I should tell him and let him decide if they should be taken care of. I just can't make myself ask him for anything very often.
So tonight, noticing my snarky mood he waits til the kids are good and asleep then takes me upstairs and orders me to undress. I'm in a very playful/sarcastic headspace and am joking a bit. He started gently enough, scratching my backside and such.. then he started spanking hard. His goal was to bring me to tears. It wasn't for my pleasure at all, it was his pleasure and my attitude adjustment. All I could do was endure it.. yelling my pain into the blankets on the bed and doing my best to stay in one place.
As he continued to spank, focusing only on one cheek and stopping to let my skin desensitize a little every so often, he built up the intensity. I wasn't always able to stay in one place and ended up on the floor at one point. I was unceremoniously picked up and put back onto the bed. A few strokes later he stopped and walked around the bed. All I could think was "What's he going to use now?!" and laid there shivering. I jumped when he began rubbing lotion into my tender behind.
Then he stripped and laid on the bed, that was my cue to pleasure him. I like doing that, I like making him feel good.
So now here I am feeling content and thinking about re-reading the first in the Beauty series.
