Sometimes Blue
Had to work, had to fight
to be Mommy's delight
Never was good enough
no matter what I did.
my best wouldn't do.
Always awkward sometimes
blue, never was good enough
for you.
Did cartwheels and handstands
took your worst abuse to make
you happy, to hear "I love you."
Always awkward sometimes blue
never was good enough for you.
Always wanted to be Mommy's girl,
cherished by you. But I wasn't good
enough for you.
Always awkward sometimes blue,
never was loved by you.
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I wrote this a few years ago and even today thinking about the feelings that inspired it can get me all choked up.
It's amazing to me that a good many of my hang ups and emotional handicaps stem were created by her. Now, how to get out from under that shadow.
