I was going to wait to write this until I'd processed things a little more fully but apparently the words can't wait for me to be ready to write them. They're chomping at the bit and keeping my attention from other things like, eating lunch!
For last night's play party Master, my Lady and I, had a cutting and needle play scene planned. I was nervous, once I was up on the table waiting as Master prepared his tools, I caught myself thinking "What have I gotten myself into? Is it too late to run away?" This would be the first cutting Master had ever done on another person and pretty much the first time my Lady had ever used needles on another person.
I know I know, some of the SSCers out there might think we were nuts, under trained, or whatever. For the record, Master has handled blades for years and cuts with the precision of a surgeon and my Lady has practiced and researched and learned from those who've done needle play for years. I've also done a fair amount of research and learning myself.
I was extremely, even overly, chatty before Master began. I think it was nervous energy. Master told me to shut up at one point in a tone that left no room for discussion. I had been sitting there directing Master. Not the wisest thing for a slave to do. When I'm nervous or scared I tend to slip into a Top space. Master's admonition for me to shut up helped me refocus.
I sat there and concentrated on my breathing. I tried to take slow deep breaths but had to be reminded to slow it down more. Just before Master began I asked if he would tell me right before he made the first cut. Just before the blade touched my flesh he said something like "There it goes..." I took a deep breath and let it out through my pursed lips as the blade began to flow through my skin. There is something to be said for a sharp blade. It doesn't drag, stutter, or scratch, it flows.
I can only describe the sensation as cold sharpness. Being scratched by a not-so-sharp knife is a hot sensation... scalpels feel cold to me.
After the first cut or two Master checked with me to be sure I was doing okay. I happily responded with "Yep!"
Master stopped part way through the cutting to do a little clean up. I bled rather well. He cut only 1/16 deep but it was enough. I enjoyed the feeling of my blood flowing down my back. It was Master's to draw as he wished.
We had an audience before we began but once the blood started to flow most of them left the room. I'll be honest, there's a little part of me that enjoys shocking people or freaking them out so seeing people leave was a little bit gratifying.
For those who remained the cutting became a learning experience. Questions were asked and Master and my Lady answered them as fully as they were able with me interjecting little bits here and there.
It was over in a relatively short period of time. It was a simple design, the rune Othila. Associated with property, we both felt this rune was the perfect symbol to cut into my flesh.
Once Master had my back cleaned up and the fresh cutting covered with a bandage it was my Lady's turn. My nerves returned full force as I watched her lay out fresh paper towels and the needles she would be using.
She would be placing needles in my breasts since Master had cut my back.
As my Lady turned to me with a needle in her hand I began to beg to be allowed to code if I felt I couldn't handle it. Master told me I had to ask my Lady as I was in her hands. I turned to her and begged to be allowed to code {safe word} if I couldn't handle it. She allowed me that one small mercy. It helped ease my nerves just a teeny bit.
My Lady suggested we try one needle and see how I handle it. After the first needle and seeing the gleam in her eyes I couldn't say no to more. So, she proceeded to insert two more needles into my right breast. The needles burned a bit but weren't too uncomfortable. The third one though was a bit sore. It was a little deeper and further down the breast than the others. I asked if we could use my left breast since the third in my right breast was sore.
My Lady was quite happy to move to the other breast and proceeded to prep the area.
She got three needles in and as with the right breast, the third needle hurt a little more than the others. During the entire scene my Lady and Master both fielded questions about needles and needle play.
After the third needle was placed she stopped putting in needles and tapped the needles through my flesh. It felt very strange. As my Lady answered some questions I bounced a bit and really enjoyed the sensations my movements produced. I was having way too much fun.
Soon it was time to take the needles out and as they came out I began to bleed. I was fascinated with the sight of my blood welling to the surface. My Lady took great care to clean the areas and then put some antibiotic ointment and bandages over them.
It was a pleasure for me to see the gleam in my Lady's eyes; she really enjoyed playing with needles. I look forward to sharing the experience with her again.
Today I sit here with the marks on my body feeling content, centered, and more tightly bound to Master and my Lady. Each time I look at the marks they've left on me I re-live last night's experiences and I smile.
