Yesterday I felt playful, I felt like Daddy's lil girl, I put my hair up in piggie tails and hoped Daddy would notice when he got home from work.
He noticed but was too tired; he needed me to be growed up. That part sucks... having to be growed up and do growed up things when all I want to do is lay on the floor and color in my coloring book or curl up in Daddy's lap for a snuggle. Sometimes it is really difficult to balance my inner kid with being a slave. My inner kid, while still submissive, doesn't serve in the same capacity that I do as Master's slave.
It's not easy talking about my inner kid, sometimes I worry what others will think. Sometimes adult ageplayers are kind of looked down on, as if there's something wrong with us. Maybe talking about it would help those folks who think there's something wrong with adult ageplayers see that we're really OK.
It's been a long time since my lil was allowed all the way out. Most of the time she peeks out when we're at the store and we see cool toys or when Daddy calls her out at special times. Other than that she sits in silence while the 'dultz do what 'dultz do. She's feeling restless, she wants to play and she wants Daddy to play with her. She's also a little sulky 'cos Daddy was too tired yesterday. Even though the grown up slave knows things happen in Master's own time, the inner kid feels a little hurt when Daddy won't play.
