Fear

Yesterday was scary, today continues to be scary. I've got a bladder infection that I've had since the end of June. I've been treated twice before with the one antibiotic I'm not allergic to. It wasn't effective. The first time I was only given a 5 day course, that wasn't enough. Then I was given a 10 day course which I finished last week.

I hadn't felt quite right since finishing the meds and yesterday the symptoms got strong enough to send me off to the doctor. The doctor looked at me and said "I don't know what to do for you." He was referring to the fact that I was allergic to the only meds that are used for treating bladder and urinary tract infections. The one that I'm not allergic to isn't as effective and is a last choice.

We talked about my reactions to each of the drugs and there is one that I only had an itchy rash with, the rest I had anaphylactic (hives and breathing difficulty) reactions to. So, here I am today on the one that gave me a rash. I have to keep an eye on my body and I've got Benedryl on hand.

It's scary knowing that I could end up with an infection that can't be treated. What happens then? What will they do? I'm extremely susceptible to bladder and urinary tract infections and I'm doing everything I can to prevent them. I'm getting to the point that I'm almost paranoid to have any sort of penetrative sex because that can cause infections for me, even with all necessary precautions.

I told Master about the med situation yesterday and he was concerned and told me we'd be watching me closely. I told M to and he kept asking over and over again, "You've told the doctor you're allergic to this medication right?" Right now, taking the medication is the lesser of two evils and that's the point I had to make to everyone, including the pharmacist. I haven't yet told m'Lady and I'm hoping I get the chance to do so today.

I think the point was finally driven home yesterday, I've got to get to an allergist to be sure I'm definitely allergic to these drugs and if I am, I need to either find a way to get desensitized to them or start bugging someone to find alternative medications. This is the first time that the medication I was taking hasn't worked. So yeah, I'm finally worried.