Friday night Master and I are to attend a play party hosted by our good friends J & K. Since the weekend, Master has been talking about play piercing my nipples.
I'm nervous about it. I've been pierced before, both play and permanent, and enjoyed it. For some reason the idea of him doing it has me completely undone. I'm totally vulnerable to him and I think that's why I'm scared, it's not just my body he'll be playing with, it's my mind.
I'd like to believe that he's just mindf*cking me but judging by his obvious excitement each time he talks about it, I don't think he is.
I'd like to say that the only thing I feel is fear and nervousness but that wouldn't be entirely honest. Each time he takes a nipple between his fingers and talks about sticking needles through it, I begin to get aroused. There's something about the intentness of his gaze, the excitement of his body, and the sheer dominance in his voice that makes my body think "Hey this will be great!" My mind, of course, is saying "Are you nuts?!"
It's strange, I'm nervous about it but I'm also sort of anticipating it. I'm not fighting it like I usually would. Normally I'd close up, not admit to my nervousness, and not really participate in the conversation. I think it's his desire and excitement that are drawing me in. I want to give him what he wants. I want to go there with him, wherever 'there' may be. I want to do all this despite my nerves, despite my head telling me it's not such a good idea.
I don't know how I'll react if I find out that he was indeed, mindf*cking me. I think maybe a mix of disappointment and relief.
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